everlasting wisdom

At endoscopy, before we can let a patient have a procedure done to him or her we need to carry out a checklist and a sort of interview. A particular patient decided to discuss just how open minded she is...

Me: Hi Mrs. Jones, I have to ask you a few questions before we can proceed.

Mrs Jones: Why, you're an American!

Me: No, no I'm not, I was born in Canada of Maltese parents.

Mrs Jones: You are foreign!

Me: Well, people generally do notice as soon as I speak, so no news there.

Mrs Jones: there is nothing wrong with being foreign and having an accent...I'm not racist...

Me: Good to hear it, Mrs Jones

Mrs Jones: .....after all, its not like you're black...

Me: erm...ah...well...how about putting on a gown and going to room 4, eh?

(yeah, shove your racist ass into room four why don't you?) Jesus. Racists who aren't racists. Its absurd. They don't even realise they are being racist. I will never forget when a friend of mine once said after someone made a lewd comment towards an african american "but...its not their fault they are black!" Sweet Jesus. Good Lord. Being black is now a fault.

Everybody, read the book "The Colour Purple". Please.

i WILL stuff a probe up your ass

My days as a reliever are over. They were an eventful and necessary time of my life, gave me plenty of experience, not to mention those days earned me my first pay cheque as a qualified nurse.

We got to choose our placement according to age, which is quite pissing off, rather than order of merit, probably because my nursing school was too lazy to place an average for the hospital to go by, but anyway. By the time my turn came to choose, the only paediatric placement was filled up and the only choice I had was a bunch of medical wards or else endoscopy. So I chose endoscopy and I don't regret it for one minute. It does take some getting used to however but I'm sure in time I will be a pro.

Endoscopy, for those not in the know, basically involves suffing a camera up someone's anus (bum hole), urethra (pee-pee hole), oesophagus (the food hole from the mouth) and trachea (breathing hole).

its good. I'm happy so far.